Heart Failure Page 9

  Slowly, Jess stood. She squared her shoulders and raised her chin as if she was about to enter a battle.

  “Mom.” She locked her gaze with her mother’s, completely unapologetic. “You don’t know what she’s doing in there. I think she’s a prostitute. Here. In our garden house.”

  The words hit Lena like a punch in the stomach. Had she just said…? Her vision blurred like a watercolor sketch in the rain. She reached out to the side of the house to steady herself.

  “Jess, what makes you say such a horrible thing?” Maggie put her arm around Lena’s shoulder as if to show her daughter on whose side she stood.

  The warmth and steadiness helped Lena to fight her dizziness and nausea, but she was still unable to say anything to defend herself.

  Jess gestured to the house. “She is meeting the strangest people in the evenings for this so-called relaxation technique. The woman undressed. You told me yourself she has financial problems and would do anything to earn money. This all adds up. She is a prostitute, and we can’t have her stay here.”

  Her voice droned in Lena’s ears, and she couldn’t make sense of why Jess was saying these awful things. But she didn’t need to understand. Anger sliced through the shock paralyzing her, burning away the fog slowing her thoughts. How dared Jess to accuse her of such a thing? Had Heather heard her? How could she explain this scene to a client?

  Lena pushed away from the wall. She hissed to Jess in the iciest tone she could muster, “Get away from me and my house. Now.” She took a deep breath and looked at Maggie. “Are you still willing to help me?”

  Maggie nodded with a grim expression and squeezed her shoulder before letting go. “Of course.”

  “Help? Mom, you can’t go in there! Do you even know what she’s asking of you?” Jess moved as if to place herself between her mother and the door.

  “Don’t be ridiculous. I know exactly what’s going on, and I don’t go around making assumptions like you do.” Maggie gripped Jess’s shoulder with one hand and shook her. “Jessica, what you did and said is not acceptable. This is not the way I raised you. I have no idea why you made such a terrible accusation, and I don’t care. You need to apologize. And keep your voice down.”

  Jess pressed her mouth together, and a muscle twitched in her cheeks, which had flushed bright red.

  Lena couldn’t tell if she colored out of anger or embarrassment. She hoped for the latter. “I don’t have time for this now. I need to get back to my client.”

  “Just a second.” Maggie stroked her thumb over Jess’s cheek. “Jessi, nothing illegal or illicit is going on here. If you don’t trust Lena, trust me.” Her voice was warm and laced with conviction.

  Jess’s stiff stance deflated. She lowered her head. “Okay.”

  “Okay is not enough. To make up for your appalling behavior, you will shut up now, accompany Lena inside, and do as she says. I’ve been her assistant more than once, and now you can take my place. Don’t worry, I’ll watch Ella tonight. Afterward, you’ll apologize, and tomorrow we three can talk about this at length.”

  Lena recognized the mom-voice. Her grandma had been able to summon the same loving fierceness at will.

  “You can’t make me…” Jess looked up with wide eyes and blinked.

  Lena wasn’t so sure it was a good idea either. Did she want to bring Jess’s negativity and distrust into a client session?

  “Mom.” The word was drawn out in a whiny tone that reminded Lena of every teenager she had ever witnessed in a disagreement with their parent.

  Maggie stared at her daughter and crossed her arms in front of her chest.

  For a long moment, Jess held her gaze, unblinking, as if she searched for answers. She swallowed visibly and nodded, then shifted her gaze to Lena. “I’m sorry. I’ll do what Mom wants.”

  It wasn’t a sincere apology, but Lena had no time to insist on anything more. Maybe Jess needed to see with her own eyes what was happening inside, or she might never completely leave her suspicions behind. “Okay. Let’s do this.”

  Maggie kissed Lena’s cheek and whispered. “Everything will be all right.” With a stern “Behave yourself, young lady,” to Jess, she left before either of them could answer.

  Lena opened the door to her home and hoped Jess would follow without further discussion.

  Jess wanted nothing more than to disappear in the darkness that had swallowed the garden. Something wasn’t adding up, and she had miscalculated badly. She had no idea what her mom had sent her into. But no matter what, she did trust her.

  She had to blink when she entered the little house. Warm air engulfed her like a tropical holiday. Candles flickered on every available surface, and the scent of vanilla and something spicier she couldn’t name eased her frayed senses.

  The woman she had seen earlier sat in an armchair and sipped a steaming drink from a small bowl. She greeted Jess with a smile as if she had expected her.

  Jess automatically smiled back, then studied the main room of the house, which had changed dramatically since Jess had last lived here. A small but fully equipped kitchen with a breakfast nook was to her left, and to her right a two-seater couch and an armchair took up most of the living area. A wooden desk stood on one side stacked with notebooks. Everything was neat and uncluttered but still comfortable and cozy. Jess had no idea how Lena achieved the effect, and now wasn’t the time to contemplate that. She had already missed most of what Lena was saying.

  “And this is Jess, my neighbor. She’ll be our victim tonight.” Lena finished her explanation with a smile.

  Victim? Jess raised her eyebrows. The playful tone of Lena’s voice was meant to tease, but it still wasn’t a word she liked to hear in this context.

  “This is Heather, my client. She wants to surprise her fiancée with a new skill on their honeymoon.” Now Lena was grinning even wider. She seemed to enjoy yanking Jess’s expectations around.

  Jess deserved this. And much more. Lena approached the whole situation with more class and humor than Jess would have in her place. If anyone had called Jess a prostitute, she wouldn’t have stopped yelling by now. How could she ever apologize to Lena for that?

  Lena picked up a neatly folded dressing gown and handed it to Jess. “You can undress in the bathroom. You’re not allergic to anything?”

  “No allergies. But what…?” Undress? Lena wanted her to wear nothing but a dressing gown? The warm air and the lulling scent slowed her thoughts to a crawl.

  “Great. I’ll let Heather choose her favorite oil. Go and get changed.” She grinned, and the flickering light made her eyes sparkle as she winked. “You may keep your panties on.”

  Jess was still hung up on the naked part, and her expression must have shouted out her confusion. Before she could ask another question, Lena opened the door to the small room they had always used to store the extra deck chairs.

  Now it was empty except for a massage table. A colorful sheet in a mandala-like pattern covered the mattress. More candles burned on the windowsill.

  Jess’s muscles weakened, and she nearly stumbled. This was about a massage? Lena was doing massages in their garden house? What had she gotten herself into?

  “Heather, take a look at these while I show Jess to the bathroom.” Lena pointed to a collection of small brown bottles with handwritten labels, then steered Jess toward the back of the house.

  Jess knew damned well where the bath was, and she guessed Lena was aware of the fact. But the warm hand on the small of her back was oddly reassuring, something real and solid in this confusing evening.

  The bathroom door shut behind Lena with a click, and she let go of Jess, took a step back, and stood straight with her hands pressed against the door. She studied Jess with a frown. “As you’ve probably guessed, these appointments are about massages, nothing else.” Her tone was matter of fact as if they were discussing the weather. “I a
ctually don’t do them myself. I teach them. Mostly couples, rarely single persons. When that is the case, Maggie helps out by getting massaged, and that’s what she volunteered you for tonight. Nothing more.”

  Not knowing what to say, Jess nodded. It might be a first for her, that she didn’t have a quick and sarcastic reply on the tip of her tongue. Were her wits failing her like her body had done?

  “If you don’t want to, you don’t have to do this. I wouldn’t hold it against you. Not everyone is comfortable being touched by complete strangers.” Lena smiled but didn’t relax her tense stance. “I can call Maggie and tell her I changed my mind.”

  Jess winced at the thought of facing her mom again right now. She had felt five years old again when her mom had scolded her on the porch, like the last time she had been lectured about privacy and snooping at doors. It was a lesson she’d thought she’d never forget. Obviously, she had.

  Sneaking around someone’s house and peeking through the windows was stalkerish, creepy, and plain wrong. She owed Lena an apology, and she would start with whatever task was required of her.

  “No, don’t call her. I’ll do whatever you need me to.” Jess held up her hands. “I’m sorry, I—”

  “Stop. I can’t do this now.” Lena’s voice quivered, and she blinked a few times. “Let’s get this evening over with, okay?”

  “Okay. I can do that.” Jess attempted a smile to reduce the tension crackling between them like the electric charge of a summer storm. “So I undress, go in there, and get a massage? That hardly seems like a punishment.”

  The corner of Lena’s mouth twitched. “Maybe I’ll stick my hands in ice water or something.” She pushed off the door behind her and left.

  As soon as she was alone, Jess let out a sigh. Before she lost her courage, she shed her clothes, folded them, and stacked them on the washing machine next to what she assumed were Heather’s. With her back to the mirror, she wrapped herself in the dressing gown and left the bathroom to face whatever Lena had in store for her.

  She found Lena and Heather bowed over a tray of dark glass bottles on the coffee table.

  Heather held one up, sniffing. “This one.”

  “Great choice.” Lena screwed the tops on the other bottles. “It’s a combination of ylang ylang, vanilla, tangerine, and a hint of lavender. Very soothing.” Without looking at Jess, Lena pointed to the small room. “Jess, why don’t you make yourself comfortable on the massage table? Just open the dressing gown and we’ll take care of the rest.”

  Grateful no one was watching, Jess opened the gown and clambered onto the table. With her face in the soft ring of the headrest, she could only see a small part of the wooden floor and her hearing was dimmed.

  The twin sets of footsteps approaching drowned out her increasing heartbeat. They stopped next to her.

  “We’ll pull the gown down now to bare her back. If you’re doing this in a hotel, you can leave the gown in place over her lower half, but if you’re at home and mind getting oil on it, replace it with a towel. You can do this part as sensually as you want to.” Lena’s voice was teasing again.

  Jess’s gown was pulled down in a quick and efficient movement that barely touched her skin. Even though it was more than warm enough in the room, her skin pebbled when it was exposed to the air. Or with anticipation.

  Why was she nervous about this? Jess swallowed. She’d had professional massages before, spa days even.

  “Watch her skin. I’ll show you something.” Lena touched her with ice-cold fingers.

  Jess yelped and flinched. “Hey!”

  Lena laughed, a warm and mellow sound that appeased her again. “Sorry, but I couldn’t resist. Heather, you touch her now.”

  Heather’s hands were warm, and Jess’s tension receded. The touch was tentative but not uncomfortable.

  “See? That’s why I had you cradle the cup of tea for a while. And I placed the bottle of oil on the stove for a minute just now. This should all be about relaxation and sensual experiences, and we don’t want to cause more tension.” Lena continued to explain something technical about the oil, but Jess stopped listening.

  A hand on her shoulder caught her attention. Lena had stepped to the front and crouched to look at Jess’s face from below. “Everything okay? Are you comfortable? May we start?” Her gaze and voice were bare of teasing now and full of warmth.

  Jess nodded, afraid her voice would betray her uneasiness with the whole situation. She didn’t mind professional touch, and she didn’t care what Heather, a complete stranger, thought, but lying half-naked under Lena’s eyes was different.

  Lena held her gaze for a second, then rose but left her hand on Jess’s shoulder. She had warmed it somehow since she’d touched her before.

  “Heather, pour the oil on Jess’s back, here in the middle. Just a few drops. We can always use more if it’s not enough.”

  Jess concentrated on the sensual flow of the oil on her skin, anticipating the next step. It had been a while since someone had touched her in a nonmedical context. She tried to remember when she’d had sex last but came up blank. Not during her pregnancy, and she hadn’t been on a date for several months before that. Had it really been over a year?

  Warm hands spread the oil, their touch light as a feather and hesitant. Not exactly unpleasant but not very relaxing either.

  “You can use your whole hand. The distribution of the oil is as much for your skin as hers,” Lena said, and more hands touched her. The second pair, Lena’s, was stronger, more decisive, painting wide arcs and circles on her back.

  That was more like it. Jess sighed and relaxed into the movement. The experience was similar enough to the professional massages she’d had in the past that she could switch her brain off.

  All too soon, they moved on to something else. Lena demonstrated a certain stroke, and Heather tried to emulate her. The back and forth between the two sets of hands was confusing at first. Jess had never noticed the strength lurking in Lena’s hands.

  The general stroking and kneading paused. “After the warm-up, we’ll search for knots and areas of tension in the muscles and tendons. Follow the lines of the muscles with your fingertips, and soon you’ll notice little differences, bumps.”

  Heather did so, hesitating here and there. “Is this one?”

  Ouch. Not quite. Jess wanted to tell her it was her scapula, but Lena beat her to it.

  “This is part of the shoulder plate. Move farther to the middle and take care not to press too hard on the bones, especially the spine.”

  Heather did as instructed, and Jess groaned.

  Oh yeah, that was definitely a tense spot.

  Lena chuckled. “I guess we found one. Now we’ll work on loosening it.” She demonstrated something that felt as if she was trying to push an iron rod through Jess’s skin.

  Before Jess could complain, the pressure disappeared. She groaned again, this time from relief.

  “Pressure is one way of relieving the tension, but only temporary. I’ll show you some other tricks.”

  As Lena proceeded to work the spot between her left shoulder blade and her spine, Jess wanted to melt into the table. She hadn’t even realized how much her muscles had suffered in the last months. It had been ages since she’d last felt able to move freely.

  Closing her eyes, Jess gave herself over to the massage. She could almost visualize wave after wave of endorphins bubbling from the spring in her mind and floating through her body. The low tones of Lena’s explanation muted to white noise as she sank deeper into the bliss.

  Heather found a different spot to test her newfound knowledge. It wasn’t as effective as Lena’s touch but still felt wonderful.

  No wonder her mom loved to participate as Lena’s assistant. Who would say no to a free massage?

  Movement next to her head alerted Jess someone had changed positions. She opened her
eyes. Bare feet had entered her field of vision, and she recognized the black yoga pants as Lena’s. Her feet were slender, and muscles played under her skin as she rose on her toes for a moment. Purple polish, so dark it was almost black, shone on immaculately groomed nails.

  It wasn’t as if Jess had a foot fetish or anything, but she appreciated beautiful feet. She’d always loved to give her girlfriends foot massages when they’d come home after a day of walking around in too-high heels.

  The urge to stretch out her arms and touch Lena’s instep popped up out of nowhere. She could almost see herself caressing Lena’s feet. She’d start with a massage of the soles, then she’d stroke along the inside. Lena would shudder and moan, and Jess would push the cuffs of the yoga pants up and trace a finger over her shin. Goosebumps would erupt all over the soft skin, and she’d kiss them away and—whoa!

  Don’t get carried away here, Jess! She licked her dry lips. What the fuck had just happened? She was warm and tingly all over, and her breasts were too tight, squished beneath her.

  “Are you still okay?” Lena’s face appeared again in her field of vision. “You tensed up.”

  Oh, great. Jess wanted to bury her face in the table, but the hole that allowed her to breathe made it impossible to hide. “Fine. I’m fine.” She swallowed and willed her croaking voice to behave. “Just a cramp in my foot.”

  “Right or left? Let me have a look at it.” Lena stood and started to move toward the end of the table.

  Oh fuck. Why had she said that? If Lena gave her a foot massage now, she’d die of embarrassment. “No, no.” She quickly wiggled her toes. “All good now.”

  “Sure?” Lena was back at her head. She touched Jess’s shoulder. “Let me know if it returns.”

  “Mhm.” Jess’s agreement morphed into a moan as Lena’s hand slid to her neck and traced with thumb and one finger up and down next to her spine.

  Lena explained something to Heather, but Jess didn’t listen as thoughts swirled in her head.